Monday, January 28, 2013

Potential Negative Effects of Attachment Parenting

Now for the long awaited sequel to my  What is Attachment Parenting post. If you haven't read that post yet then go read it and come back....I'll wait.......

Did you read it? Okay now we can go on to the effects of AP. 

First off, I'd like to point out that AP is not so much a set of rules as it is suggestions. At the end of the day only you can decide what is best for your own child, and if you choose AP and there is something that you just don't agree with, don't do it. It's as simple as that

So anyways, I've been doing some research and it's actually pretty difficult to find hard evidence of what the long term effects of AP are. Most of the time the sources I found turned out to be opinion pieces, and those were so ridiculously biased that I won't pollute my blog by mentioning them by name for fear that I may actually provide an audience for them . They focus their opinions on the stereotypical over-the-top AP parent, i.e. hypochondriac, borderline Munchhausen Syndrome, total ignorance of their children's talents to encourage equality,and whatever other ungodly trends have hit the parenting world that I'm unaware of. None of which apply to me, and I still consider myself an AP parent. The source goes on to the selfish focus on a parent's own intimate needs over the comfort of their child, aka giving up marital relations in lieu of co-sleeping, thereby being completely unaccepting towards co-sleeping as a whole. As far as I know, there is nothing under AP that says that co-sleeping has to take place every single night. Obviously, parents need time together away from the child, that's what separate bedrooms and babysitters (for out of the home occasions) are for. 

I did find one source that managed to be professional about the whole thing. In the article: Can 'Attachment Parenting' be Harmful? , Dr. Peter Nieman mentions two potential negative effects of AP as seen by skeptics. The first and arguably more important of the two , is the potential for the child to be denied boundaries and in turn lack understanding in regards to the mother's eventual exhaustion. In other words, the child may become so reliant on the mother always being available that when the time inevitably comes that she isn't available the child, the child may suffer from anxiety.

The answer to this potential negative effect seems pretty obvious, I mean it's literally written above, "the potential for the child to be denied boundaries". Don't allow the potential denial of boundaries, set practical unwavering ones. Have a set schedule each day, and do your best to follow it. Obviously no one is perfect, and keeping a set schedule is easier said than done, but using a physical calendar or planner will definitely help.

The second potential negative effective that Nieman mentions, that he also refers to as anecdotal, or unreliable and based on opinion, is that on the mother specifically. The potential for fatigue, sleep deprivation, weakened immune system, depression,  and the potential for weight gain if the mother chooses to eat to deal with depression. Although Nieman says that "no definitive studies have confirmed that", it kind of just sounds like the typical first year parent problems that every mother and father go through regardless of their parenting style.

I intended to be non- biased with this post, but the few sources I could find were either too biased themselves to be taken seriously, or they listed potential negative effects and then went on undermine them. So I have a question for you readers today:

Do you have any negative experience with AP families? Have you even heard negative rumors of other AP families? Can you find a non biased source that shares proof of negative effects? Leave any answers as a comment below

This post ran a little long so I will write a separate one soon that will go over the reported positive effects of AP, and the effects I've seen personally on Annabelle.


Monday, January 21, 2013

Getting Annabelle's Ears Pierced!

So I've been busy over the last week or so, hence the lack of any new posts last week. Mostly me and Annabelle were running around with family, and getting the house all cleaned up in preparation for her big 1st birthday bash! I can't believe that in about 2 weeks I will be the proud mommy of a 1 year old little girl! Now onto the main point of this post, Annabelle got her ears pierced! 4 days ago we spent the day with Paul's mother (Grandma) and grandmother (GG). We went to the party store and picked up some  more decorations for the party and even found a first birthday candle with a cupcake on it! We ended the day by walking aimlessly around walmart for over 2 hours! When we finally decided it was time to go, we just happened to pass by the jewelry department. Grandma remembered that she had three watches that needed some touch-ups, and as we waited for the jeweler to finish with them, we thought what better time than to get Annabelle's ears pierced as well? We had to wait about 20 minutes, because at the time only one jeweler was available, and we didn't really want to have each ear pierced separately  so we waited for her co worker to come back from lunch. Here is Annabelle right before the piercing, she couldn't have been in a better mood shoving pepperonis in her mouth. The pepperonis were GG's but there was no chance of having any usable number left after Annabelle discovered how awesome they taste!

In lieu of the typical response of a baby getting their ears pierced, Annabelle screamed one time and that was it. No tears, no real fussing, she was totally happy a few seconds later when we reloaded her hands with pepperonis! We decided to go with amethyst butterflies, in honor of Annabelle's birth month, February. Here is how they looked later that night.

They are upside down in this photo but you can easily make out the shape of the butterfly. She managed to get a small scratch underneath during one of the earlier attempts to pierce her ears. In all it took about five attempts to get her to stay still long enough, while at the same time having both jewelers have their guns lined up. During one attempt the jeweler began to push out the earring and Annabelle jerked, hence the scratch lining up with the earring. All in all, Annabelle took the whole thing very well, and I almost regret not doing it sooner. They look so pretty on her, and she forgot about them so quickly that she hasn't messed with them at all. They even came with a matching child size necklace that she also wears happily without any problems. I did feel a little bad that my mom was somewhat upset that she wasn't able to do it, however there's always belly button rings later on LOL.
So that's what's new with Miss Annabelle, I will close with yet another shameless plug to her cuteness. Here is sleepy Annabelle!

Thursday, January 10, 2013

The effects of Oppa Gangnam Style on Babies

Now a little while back when this song first came out, there was a rumor going around facebook that playing the song for a fussy baby was a sure  fire remedy. So of course I had to test it out of curiosity. I must say I was surprised at how well it actually works! If she is cranky or sleepy the song will put her out in minutes, and if she's in a good mood she'll dance her little heart out! I present to you exhibit A:

Wednesday, January 9, 2013

What is Attachment Parenting?

Whenever Annabelle meets someone new, rather than freaking out and having a tantrum, she instantly demands (as much as she can without language skills) to be picked up by them to get a better look. Time and time again people have responded in surprise at how friendly she is, how easy she is to work with, and how well behaved she is overall. Now, I know I can't take full responsibility for how she behaves, because she has been the biggest bundle of happiness since the day she was born. However, I'd like to think that choosing Attachment Parenting as a model to reference as a first time mother, had at least a little bit to do with it.

So, now I bet you are wondering, :

What exactly is Attachment Parenting?

Attachment parenting, is a method of parenting that focuses on nurturing and positive discipline. This is a short and general answer, but AP just can't be summed up in one sentence. Below I will go in-depth to explain what AP is by introducing the various branches.

(Read More)

Monday, January 7, 2013

Welcome to my Blog! (Again)

In one month I will be celebrating my daughter's first birthday. I can honestly say that at the beginning of February last year, I never would have imagined how crazy, amazing, and incredible the next 11 months were going to be! I've tried a couple of times now to keep a blog going to record the different milestones and    in general just the thousands of things that make first time motherhood so awesome, but I've always gotten to busy to keep it going for more than a couple of weeks. Fortunately now my daughter is somewhat independent enough to give me a few moments to myself each day, and look at me managing to still devote those moments to her! I'm creating this blog as a record of how life is for our little family as something to look back on when my daughter is old enough to pay attention to anything that isn't furry and sings for more than 2.5 seconds.

So without further adieu, let me introduce you to the star of this blog, the love of my life (even more-so than her father, lol), an avid lover of Yo Gabba Gabba (no matter how painful of  a migraine it may cause her parents), devourer of all things food or human (except for peas), and the center of me and her father's world, Annabelle Roselynn. We hope that you will join us on this sticky, and at times downright disgusting journey called Childhood.